Why Aren’t Nerds Popular?

credit: freedigitalphotos.net by stock images

credit: freedigitalphotos.net by stock images


Growing up with parents who focused on education, I did pretty well in school. I was proud of myself, my parents were proud and so were my teachers. Unfortunately, I remember vividly one time when my academic prowess was frowned upon. I started middle school which was in a different school with different students. A few months into the school year, my pre-algebra teacher announced that I received a score of 100 on three consecutive exams. I guess I should have been proud, but I didn’t really like the spotlight. Then I heard some classmates whisper, “nerd” and “geek” in the background. And when the teacher turned back to the blackboard, someone threw a crumpled up piece of paper at me. On the next test, I did something that I am not proud of. I succumbed to the pressure of my classmates and purposely got an answer wrong so I wouldn’t be teased. (It turned out I didn’t need to purposely get an answer wrong as I answered another question incorrectly anyway). There went my streak of 100s. I was disappointed that I didn’t score 100, but even more disappointed that I let others influence me negatively.

Even parents think it's okay to shame academic success

Even parents think it’s okay to shame academic success

You know the stereotype of the nerd or the geek. We see this all the time on television. The smart student wearing glasses who is a bit goofy and socially awkward. In a way, I feel like the movie Mean Girls, starring Lindsey Lohan explores many of the themes about whether intelligence is valued in our youth (Yes, I did enjoy the movie…please don’t judge me). Lohan’s character who was home-schooled in Africa does not understand the social dynamics of high school in the states. In the movie, it shows the “nerds” and “geeks” being relegated to 2nd class citizens and sit in a different part of the cafeteria. Lohan’s character is forced to join the mathletes as punishment which is seen as social suicide. She pretends to be dumb so that a guy she is attracted to would be interested in her. The popular kids are the ones who are more interested in their wardrobe and parties, the one’s who are superior athletes, rather than the ones who are academically successful.

“In a world where Paris bloody Hilton is seen as a role model to teenage girls, the incentive to study hard and be proud of your smarts gets drowned out in a sea of baby-voiced dreams to become the next American Idol. God forbid you open your mouth and be branded an elitist, Smarty McGee!” – Hortense Smith in an article entitled, Why Don’t We Value Intelligence Anymore?

Many people are saying that “nerds” are cool now, citing Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates as well as other tech innovators. They also mention shows like The Big Bang Theory. I think many people are fascinated by new tech gadgets, but I don’t think there’s any correlation with nerdiness being cool or an increase in the embrace of study and education. An interesting note which may only interest me: the character Leonard Hofstadter from Big Bang is named after Richard Hofstadter who wrote the Pulitzer Prize winning book, Anti-Intellectualism in America.

“I know a lot of people who were nerds in school, and they all tell the same story: there is a strong correlation between being smart and being a nerd, and an even stronger inverse correlation between being a nerd and being popular. Being smart seems to make you unpopular.” – Paul Graham, programmer, writer and investor.

Getting back to my experience growing up, when I told my mother that some kids were being teased at school, her conclusion was that the child must not be doing well in school which results in teasing. My mother grew up and went to school in China, and I remember looking at her thinking she had no idea what she was talking about. I thought that her conclusion could only be valid in some bizzaro world.

Recently, as I was talking to my wife who grew up and went to school in Honduras, she told me that she did not know of the concept of the “nerd” when she was in school. However, she went to private school growing up. When she came to the states to go to university, she said that she would raise her hand and participate in class, until she realized that most students did not participate, so she stopped participating to blend in with the crowd. I asked a friend who grew up in South Korea, and he was also not familiar with the “nerd” concept. He said that students were pretty intense about studying. According to him, there was a saying that if you wanted to pass, you slept 4 hours, and if you wanted to fail, you slept 5 hours.

Thinking that this “nerd” concept was local to those living in the U.S, I decided to ask some fellow bloggers who went to school outside of this country.

Sam from Financial Samurai, explained that it “goes on everywhere, including schools outside the US for sure. The cool thing to do is to blend in with the crowd, as it always is.”

Erin from Broke Millenial said:

There were of course kids who got teased in both of my international schools (Japan and China) but a lot of academic insults were tied into race. Getting a B was called an “Asian Fail” while getting a D or F was a “White Fail” in my schools. If someone said, “Ugh, I failed that test.” The response was generally, “Did you Asian Fail or White Fail?” I even had a teacher once tell my (IB) math class that it always seemed like the white kids were in this specific class because it was the lowest level of IB math.

I also went to very privileged, private schools which means everyone was smart and to not keep up academically was embarrassing and could get you expelled. I went to school #12 on that list but my school in China was actually more expensive, we just didn’t have a boarding school option.

With regard to the Asian Fail, I’ve never heard of it, but I think I may have experienced it. My mom was a bit of a “Tiger Mom” and while my non-Asian peers were applauded for getting a 95 on a test, my mom would ask me where the 5 points went! However, I don’t want to make this topic about Asian versus non-Asian education systems. While I do notice many Asian cultures put studying and schooling as a top priority, I find that the method of teaching is based on repetition and rote learning which sometimes stunts creativity. And my Korean co-worker’s experience where there is pressure to sleep less than 5 hours to continue studying is pretty extreme and I don’t think it’s healthy to put that much stress and pressure on students. Okay, sorry for going on a tangent! With the privileged private school aspect, I think that makes a difference. My wife also went to private school growing up and that may be why should was unfamiliar with the “nerd” concept. The high school I went to was considered an elite school and students were chosen based on their academic record. Studying hard and being smart was not frowned upon there.

C. from Romania Experience said,

The kids with good grades and who study a lot are often times picked on, called nerds and other names and are not allowed to hang out with the “cool” kids. What’s even worse in my opinion is that there’s a sort of a cult growing bigger and bigger about not studying and we have teenagers who brag about not reading a single book in their life, who barely pass the year and these are the guys everybody wants to hang out with. As a result of this and many other factors probably, the results to a simulation for the exam all high school kids in their final year must take (and pass) before even being allowed to apply for college were the worst in our history: just 42% managed to pass and most of them with very low grades.

Pauline from Reach Financial Independence said,

For me a nerd is not necessarily gifted, on the contrary, they will spend hours and hours studying to get good grads. In my class there was a group of guys that were always studying and had good grades, but often without studying much I got better grades, and no one picked on me for being nerdy because I didn’t study a lot. Anyway, yes sadly we bully students in European high schools as well for wanting to outperform. But in my school if you did well and made it look natural you didn’t get picked on.

It is sad that you have to make it look “natural” and that you can’t study a lot without being a target. Honestly, working hard and studying is more important in my opinion. Not everyone is naturally smart and can understand topics quickly, most students grasp the topic by spending a lot of time working on it.

How will kids gain necessary skills and become academically successful if it isn’t something that is valued by their peers? Why do you think nerds aren’t popular? It seems based on the experience of a few bloggers that I surveyed, this happens everywhere, but if you went to school in a different country, please share your experience on this topic.

64 thoughts on “Why Aren’t Nerds Popular?

  1. Dave @

    I don’t have a lot of experience or insight into youth psychology other than just my real-world experience, so my guess is just that – a guess. But what immediately comes to mind is insecurity. Kids in the United States have plenty of insecurity issues as they are figuring out life. Those who are insecure about their intelligence are able to feel a bit better by devaluing intelligence among their peers. If being smart isn’t cool, then it’s ok if they don’t feel smart.

    So perhaps there is a better way to help kids FEEL smart as they grow up. Not every kid is a genius, but I think generally, kids are smarter than they are made to feel. How to go about doing this? I have no clue.
    Dave @ recently posted…Never Own A Car: The NYC Competitive AdvantageMy Profile

    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      I think you make a great point. Bullying others generally stems from insecurity.

  2. Tonya@Budget and the Beach

    I kind of have experience with neither. I was not a cool kid, nor was I a smart “nerd” or “geek.” I think if I could I would have chosen to be smart versus popular quite frankly, although it’s hard to convince young people that this is a better option when they are in the thick of things.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Yea, it’s pretty tough to convince teenagers that popularity is not that important. At that age, it seems that popularity and being accepted is the most important goal.

  3. Shannon @ Financially Blonde

    I remember in middle school, I tried out for the cheerleading squad and the only selected two 7th graders, the rest were 8th graders. Since I was one of the two 7th graders, I stared at the list on the bulletin board shocked and pleased with myself, until I heard someone behind me (who didn’t realize I was standing there) say “How did Shannon make it, she is such a nerd.” I went from an extreme high to an extreme low in a matter of minutes. It’s awful how other kids can make you feel bad about yourself for any number of reasons. In high school, I was a nerd, but I went to a school where nerds were respected, so I am not sure what it would feel like to have to “dumb down” my performance to fit in. My son is 8 and I hope he never feels this pressure. I think the best way that we can combat it, though, is just to make sure that our children have a strong feeling of self-worth and self-esteem. If they have that, it won’t matter what other kids are saying.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      That sucks someone made a comment about you making it on the cheerleading squad…they were probably jealous! So being a cheerleader made you cool right? =) I think you are spot on…we have to make sure our children have a strong feeling of self-worth and self-esteem…any tips on doing that?

  4. DC @ Young Adult Money

    I was always pretty smart and got good grades but somehow avoided bullying. I think it’s because I went to a smaller private school in grade school then a somewhat larger (but still relatively small) high school. There were more “smart” kids than usual, I guess, so grades didn’t come up too much as far as bullying or putting people into different groups. Most kids did well.

    I think it’s difficult to change the culture of grade or high school. Kids don’t care what the teacher’s or parent’s initiatives are. I guess if enough parents cared (and I mean almost all of them) it could change a school, though, and perhaps even the culture.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Changing the culture and mentality is tough when it seems ingrained in our heads for so long.

  5. femmefrugality

    My experience was similar to Pauline’s though in an American area. I lived in a privileged area, and being smart wasn’t a bad thing as long as you wore the right clothes. The “dumb” kids were looked down upon by the smart, but had their own cliques. The worst teasing was reserved for those who weren’t trying to be perfectly attractive within that suburban bubble’s definition of beauty.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      That was my experience in high school…I was no longer teased for doing well for school…I was looked down upon because I didn’t wear the right clothes. It’s tough growing up! My school was definitely very cliquey.

  6. EL @ MoneyWatch101

    I didn’t study abroad, I’ve lived in NYC and now in NJ all my life. In my area you always see a separation of geeks and popular kids. I feel from my experience I did not want to be a part of one side, those who maintained a balance by being social at times and not showing too much stress over grades never got teased. You have to care about grades, but do not let it consume all your time. Also teachers have to be aware of the teasing in any school system and not put “A” kids in the spotlight just to spark competition. (It does more harm than good)
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      You might be right about competition, but I guess some thing that competition may motivate others to work harder. I’m not sure if most want to be part of the unpopular side…they kind of end up there based on various factors.

    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Oh I think there were definitely those who thought they were popular! Good luck with your daughter =) Yes, I think the nerds will take over one day…haha

  7. Joe Saul-Sehy

    Man, what a great piece.

    I’m writing this and watching “The Profit” on CNBC, and it’s so strange to me that the captains of business are mostly people who were “nerds” in school. My kids both did very well in high school and we’re incredibly popular. Now that they’re in college, they’re both getting along much, much better. Why? I think their high school didn’t value intelligence, while each University does. For us it was a process of enduring the crush of mediocrity and parenting enough to show them the vision of what could be if they pressed on.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Thanks Joe! Pretty awesome that your kids were both popular and did well in school. I think for the most part…those who don’t care about academics are weeded out of university. Though there were plenty of slackers in college who were there just to be there. You must have done a great job as a parent!

  8. Kemkem

    I must be super old. When l was in school, there was really no geeks and popular separation. It was more like the kids against the teachers/principal. It helped that everyone wore the same nerdy school uniform! What you did get though was a nickname that stuck with you. If you were short, “shortie” , fat, “fatty” etc..and you had to suck it up. Now 35 years later on fb, l see everyone still uses the same nicknames, even in their private lives lol! Most are still friends. I noticed the cliques after moving to the U.S. In case you’re wondering, mine was “dodo”, my ultimate favorite food…was then, still is.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Kids versus teachers/principal makes more sense. I think it does help that everyone wears the same school uniform. That way no way can tease you based on how you are dressed. What’s a “dodo”? I was thinking the bird =)

  9. C. the Romanian

    It’s pretty hard to say why nerds are not popular. The stereotype of socially awkward geeks is not true in all cases – if it were, that would’ve been the reason. But I believe that nerds are left outside the “cool” groups and picked on simply because they are intimidating. You can’t get smarter than a person that’s smarter than you, but you have to prove that they are inferior. So you bully them, you make fun of them and you ignore them. Probably we all feel a need to show that we are superior, that we are better and since you can’t beat a nerd at their own game, you have to come up with something else.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Yea, I think bullies are generally insecure. But what about athletes…they are superior physically and intimidating but they aren’t bullied. I guess it’s because they are physically intimidating!

  10. John @ Wise Dollar

    Great post Andrew! I think so much of it comes down to what’s valued. For most that’s going to be the external and if you’re considered “smart” or a “nerd” then there is unfortunately derision that comes as a result of that. I had a pretty standard upbringing, so I really can’t speak to a whole lot of this. I got did well in school, but not top of the class by any means. What I do remember though was that my Dad always pushed me to do my best. I hated it at the time, but now I see that he was just wanting me to work as hard as I could. I would also agree with C’s comment in that many feel inferior to those they feel are “smarter” than them. Those that value more external things don’t understand them on one level and thus don’t include them as part of the crowd.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Thanks John! My parents definitely pushed me to do well in school and told me that it will pay off in the future.

  11. Kathy

    My son took care of the athlete vs. nerd conflict by being the valedictorian of his high school class AND the captain of his football team!

    I do think the comments of Broke Millenial has a good point about the ethnic views on education. The Asian culture highly values education and their children are taught that it is not ok to fail in school. It looks like, in the U.S. at least, that the black population doesn’t value it at all. In fact, some blacks who do well in school report being harassed by other blacks and accused of acting like whitey. Then, of course, when those who do get a good education end up leaving the “hood” they are accused of being Uncle Toms. The white kids in U.S. fall in between, with many valuing education and studying hard while others would rather coast and just do enough to graduate. I think the parents have a responsibility to instill in their children the value that getting an education has for their future prosperity.

    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Valedictorian and captain of the football team…that is pretty awesome. I think you make some good points. Bill Cosby spoke on those points at an NAACP speech I believe http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/cosby.asp. Some thought his honesty great and others condemned it. In general, I do think it’s the parents responsibility to instill the value of education on their child…a teacher can only do so much.

  12. E.M.

    This is a great topic, and I agree with Dave’s comment. Kids are really insecure, and when they see others getting good grades, they devalue that because it’s a struggle for them. They’re trying to convince themselves that it doesn’t matter. I was more in the nerd crowd than not, but thinking back, in elementary school, the popular kids were actually the smart kids. But in elementary school, grades don’t matter as much!

    When you get into middle school and high school, it gets a bit worse, because (at least for us) classes are divided into regular, honors, and AP. It’s easy to see who is smart based on that. Thankfully, I was in AP classes in high school, surrounded by others who valued intelligence, so the bullying went down. I can completely relate to not wanting the spotlight – that happened to me a few times, and instead of feeling proud, I felt ashamed. Everyone views you as a know-it-all, and their jealousy can turn into hate. It’s awful.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Yes, most bullying stems from insecurity. You’re right about elementary school…I guess kids that age are still innocent. Unfortunately, something changes when they get closer to middle school and high school. It’s probably conducive to learning when you’re surrounded by others who value intelligence. But it’s probably also a bad thing to be surrounded by others who don’t value it, so some schools like to integrate the students of different levels. It’s tough.

  13. Alicia

    I embody a nerd through and through. Good student in public school in band until grade 12. Took all the advanced math and science classes, and also the advanced literature classes above the basic requirements. I was teased pretty heavily, and call a nerd or geek more times than I can count. For the entire year of grade 11 I didn’t have an friends because my “best friend” turned all our friends against me. It wasn’t fun to say the least.

    Then I continued on for a BSc and a PhD. After I got into my BSc I was surrounded by “nerds” and then there became a hierarchy of “nerd coolness”. But I stopped caring because I was older by that point and I valued the friends I had. My fiance told me recently that he envied me and my education and said he wished he had realized that people like me weren’t losers in high school. We were the ones who got somewhere (generally)… I think it was spurred on by me calling myself a loser about something.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Sorry to hear about grade 11…it’s tough when someone you consider your best friend betrays you. Hierarchy of “nerd coolness”…that’s hilarious! When you get older and wiser, you stop caring about popularity and stuff like that, but it’s definitely tough on younger kids. BSc and PhD…that’s very impressive Alicia!

  14. Tie the Money Knot

    I think it’s about social status in terms of ability to have what’s cool at that point in time. When younger, for guys anyway, it’s about being good in sports or talking. Being a good student without athletics or being a socialite simply offers little value when younger. You aren’t going to offer your classmates a job or help their careers because they have neither.

    Now, it’s clear that “nerds” can make a LOT of money. Right or wrong, having extreme wealth can provide a lot of really cool things. That matters when people are older and the practicalities of life set in.

    When you can give people what the want, you become cool. That’s my theory anyway!
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Interesting theory! It’s definitely about social status…but what does being good at sports or talking offer to your fellow classmates? I do see your point though. But wouldn’t doing well in school or having a good understanding of the material offer value too…you can tutor other students and help them understand the material.

  15. Debt and the Girl

    I think geeks and nerds are taking over the world. When I was a kid, the geekier kids got bullied. Now those kids are super successful. I guess they got the last laugh. I for one am glad that the trait of being smart is getting more popular. Being smart is the slowly becoming the new cool.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      That is probably the hope of “geeks and nerds” growing up…that they’ll take over the world when they grow up to be super successful! Revenge of the Nerds! I’m hoping being smart eventually does become the new cool.

  16. Done by Forty

    That stuff about Asian failing cracked me up. For what it’s worth, my mom is from the Philippines and I did get grounded a week for each “B” I brought home on my report card, so I didn’t bring home many “B”s. I don’t know what to call that. Asian grounding?
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  17. Raquel@Practical Cents

    I was never a fan of my teachers announcing my grades out loud. I remember this happened to me in college and I was not happy about it. That is an invasion of privacy in my book. If I want to share and brag that’s my call not the teacher’s .

    In the end I believe it’s all about insecurity. Those who bully are usually insecure about themselves.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Yea, I think teachers think it motivates other students to do well or deter them from doing bad for fear they might be called out. I don’t like that method either.

  18. Kim

    I was a nerd in a rural public school in Kentucky. It was not a popular thing to be, but I knew it was my ticket out. High school was not my finest time, and I thought I had left all that behind, but college was about as bad in some ways. In my higher level science classes, everyone was smart, so that felt comfortable, but in my general ed classes, it was almost worse than high school. I had one professor who was like your high school teacher and announced who had the highest score on the weekly test. It was most always me and eventually, he just wadded up my test paper and threw it at me. This was a college professor. I know he though he was being funny, but it still makes me cringe to this day. It’s sad we can’t just own what we are and accept that everyone is not the same.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Yea, like I said to Raquel…I’m not a fan of announcing the scores. What’s up with throwing the test paper at you? It seems while most professors are learned they never learned to be good teachers.

  19. Broke Millennial

    I always love a controversial post and think you tackled this subject well. To clarify my second quote that was part of a larger email — my school in Japan was on a list of 13 schools for the extremely rich (http://www.theepochtimes.com/n3/201855-10-private-schools/). It really shouldn’t have been as plenty of other international schools are more expensive, it simply had a boarding option which seemed to be a pre-req for this particular list.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Thanks…I didn’t really think it was too controversial actually. Sorry about the confusion, I added the link…and thanks again for helping me out with this post.

  20. Mel @ brokeGIRLrich

    I don’t really remember there being a “nerd” culture in the public school I grew up in – but there were Honors classes and regular classes. I was always in the Honors program or taking AP courses, so everyone I was always around was sort of the same. The only place you really co-mingled with kids in the other types of classes was in the gym or after school activities and I remember kids being more likely to get picked on for being chubby or uncoordinated than being smart.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      It seems like kids can always find something to pick on…how sad!

  21. Cash Cow Couple

    I think that you’re right. It’s not cool to be smart in elementary/middle/high school. But it starts to become cool when you get to college, and by the time you’re out in the “real world” being smart is to be desired. Smarter people have more opportunity and are viewed as more successful than their underachieving counterparts. Interesting concept as to why it changes so drastically.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Definitely true…hopefully kids are not deterred from working hard at school because when you’re young…getting in the “real world” seems like a long ways away.

  22. anna

    Haha, I LOVE Mean Girls, too! Even though Rachel McAdams did amazing in her role, it was still hard to not like mean Regina George. :) I was considered a nerd back then, too, and though I didn’t fit into mainstream high school, I did find some solace within the classes since I was with other like-minded (or worked just as hard) folks in AP classes. It’s unfortunate that it’s how that works, but I think it’s the bullies’ insecurities for the most part. It’s still hard to rectify, especially at such a vulnerable age, but in the long run I think people see that it’s better to be smart and work hard in future years.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Good…I’m glad I’m not the only one! It was definitely easier when you’re with like-minded students. Although some schools like to mix kids together hoping the hard-working students work ethic rubs off on other students…I’m not sure what the best method is.

  23. Laurie @thefrugalfarmer

    Love this, Andrew, and I believe this whole concept of being a “loser” if you do well is partly why America is in such a mess right now. I was a straight-A student up until I hit high school. After a few times of being teased, I went the other way and became a bad-a__ rebel, making sure not to take any crap from anyone ever again. I’m still disappointed in myself for wasting those high school years when I could’ve gotten a great education and maybe even went to college, but I didn’t want to be left out, you know? This is part of the reason we homeschool too: so that our kids feel free to be who they want to be. Last year we went to a party in the neighborhood, and our oldest, who is 14, was stunned at the behavior of the public schooled girls there. They were so concerned about getting the attention of the boys there, and played the ditzy girl role and dressed provocatively to grab their attention. My nerdy daughter (I say this proudly, and she proudly calls herself a nerd) was stunned at their behavior. She didn’t understand why the girls would want to degrade themselves in that way and why they had no sense of individuality and self. I realize that not all traditional schooled kids behave that way, but there is absolutely pressure to do the things that make one “popular”, and very rarely does that include being smart and getting good grades.
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Thanks for sharing your story…see that’s what I fear for my kids and other students…that the teasing will make them not want to work hard at school. You’re doing a great job with the girls…must have made you smile when you saw your daughter’s reaction to the ditzy girls behavior.

  24. Holly@ClubThrifty

    I understood the concept of “nerds” in high school, and I noticed how cruel kids could be to one another. It’s funny now many of the more “popular” kids have literally done nothing with their lives, while the “nerds” are successful =/
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    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      That’s what kept me going as a kid…that I’d be successful in the future!

  25. Shannon @ The Heavy Purse

    This is a fantastic post, Andrew! There were definitely cliques when I was in school too. Sadly, I think within the American culture they exist is some shape or form, which is probably part of the problem. We expect the divide. Popular kids should tease the nerds. I do see when schools where high academic achievement is expected that kids are less likely to be teased for being smart or a “nerd” but more so for not being conventionally attractive or not having the right clothes or for not being athletic. I’m definitely working with the girls to encourage their intelligence and teach them to be compassionate to everyone. Right now they are young so they like getting good grades and earning stickers, etc. and I hope it stays that way.
    Shannon @ The Heavy Purse recently posted…The 3 Money Topics Teenagers Most Like to DiscussMy Profile

    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Thanks Shannon! I know you’re definitely doing a great job with the girls to encourage intelligence as well as compassion. Peer pressure is tough…especially when the kids get older but if they have a solid foundation, they’ll know what to do.

  26. Joshua Rodriguez @ CNAFinance.com

    Hey Andrew, thanks for sharing this very personal story. I remember doing things I shouldn’t have to blend in too. I thought the nerd thing was worldwide, but I can imagine that other cultures look at things differently. I would love to see a change in the perspective of American culture. We make fun of many Asian traditions like trying hard and succeeding, producing perfection or producing nothing, and coming to America to open restaurants. When in all reality, we shouldn’t be teasing calling names, or dishing out insults, we should be learning. My dad taught me that lesson when I was very young and I’m incredibly thankful for it!
    Joshua Rodriguez @ CNAFinance.com recently posted…How We Saved More Than $1,000 For Our Wedding…In A Month!My Profile

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  28. Kalen @ MoneyMiniBlog

    I don’t think it’s really the nerd’s fault that they aren’t popular, I think people tend to be intimidated when someone knows something that they don’t, thus the “cool kids” don’t know what else to do, but make fun of and pick on the nerds. In the adult world, nerds are often pretty popular though. Great post!
    Kalen @ MoneyMiniBlog recently posted…How to Build a Rock Solid Retirement PortfolioMy Profile

  29. Financial Samurai

    Man, so you were the one who got the 100% scores! I tried my best to do the same but could NEVER get a perfect score or straight A’s. it was frustrating as hell. Some cteacher or course really screwed me up.

    I wish I contributed more to your post. I don’t think I realized it was for a post actually. But, I would say it was much cooler being a nerd overseas attending international schools that here in the US.

    If you are around on Tues, there is an event at Apela at 12noon btw. Free lunch and behavioral revelation study by a Columbia professor. Shot you a DM on Twitter.

    Sam
    Financial Samurai recently posted…The Financial Samurai Podcast Episode 2: Is Paying Down Debt Considered Savings?My Profile

    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      That was back in junior high school…not sure I was as good of a student later on. Thanks for the info and the help.

  30. Anita

    In Germany you call them: Streber
    I have been bullied my whole life for being very smart (now member of German MENSA) even from my family who didn’t understand my hunger for knowledge (farmers). I never passed my physics academics studies because of depression and study phobia. I feel guilty when I try to educate myself and I start being paniced with dyspnoea and perspiration.

    1. livingrichcheaply@gmail.com Post author

      Interesting, thanks for your comment. Sorry to hear that your family was not supportive of your studies and that you struggled with depression as well as bullying. It’s sad to hear that education and studying, which are positives can be frowned upon. I’m hoping that you are in a better place now…you should NEVER feel guilty for trying to educate yourself. Stay strong!

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