“Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be.” – Alan Watts
I’ve read many posts asking what advice you would give your younger self if you could go back in time. When it comes to personal finance, many people might tell their younger self to not live above their means, to not try and keep up with the Joneses, or to start investing earlier. And of course, there will be people who say they would tell their younger self to invest in Google! Your present self is older and wiser, learning much from experiences that your younger self has yet to go through. It makes sense that we would love to go back in time to impart advice to our younger selves to save him or her from making the same mistakes that we did.
In one of the comments from an article asking what you advice you would give your younger self, one person said that it wouldn’t matter what advice he would have given because his younger self wouldn’t have followed it anyway. He said that sometimes you have to experience those failures or mistakes to truly learn from them. In an interview, Tony Robbins said that he would not change anything about his past, even after sharing his experiences growing up where his mother physically abused him. He said those experiences shaped how he is today and he wouldn’t be where he is if he changed the past.
I think those, “What advice would you give your younger self” articles are fun to read. While there is obviously no time machine so you can’t go back and give advice to your younger self, a younger person reading your experience would hopefully learn from your own mistakes and hopefully avoid making them. Thinking about this question, I started to ponder the reverse of this question. What would your younger self say to your present self? I thought it would be an interesting question to ask. And a question that only you could really answer as only you truly know your past self and your present self.
Your younger self was probably not as wise and experienced so it would be tough to ask him or her for advice. But your younger self was probably more ambitious, naïve, more of a dreamer, idealistic and less cynical than your present self. Would your younger self be excited about what you’ve done with your life or would your younger self be disappointed that you didn’t fulfill the dreams you had when you were younger?
Thinking back to when I was in high school and college and trying to put myself into the shoes of the younger Mr. Living Rich Cheaply, I think overall my younger self would be proud of where I am now. My younger self always thought that at this age I’d be married with two kids and working as an attorney. So I have crossed those expectations off the checklist. I was a frugal person even when I was younger so I wouldn’t have been too surprised that I am still living below my means.
However, I’d be lying if I said that my younger self wouldn’t also be a little disappointed as well. My younger self may have been the type to live below his means, but he always thought my older self would have BIGGER means to live within! I’m pretty sure my younger self would have expected that my older self would own a house, especially with a family of 4, rather than in an apartment that is about 800 square feet. Sorry, younger self…housing is expensive in NYC! Also, while my younger self thought that I would become an attorney in the future, I probably pictured one in a prestigious position or one who was helping to change the world. Hey, I was young and idealistic, okay! I’m pretty sure I didn’t imagine that I’d be working in a back office, mostly writing and doing research. Not to say I dislike my job. It’s okay and I enjoy parts of it, but I’m sure my younger self wouldn’t be daydreaming about it.
What would your younger self think about how your present self is doing in life?